Most of my clients are dating online as a way to find a true love partner who is also looking for a long-term committed relationship. And several of them are open to long-distance online dating. Yet not all are. The reason for the divide is that there are definite advantages and disadvantages to long-distance relationships.

However, before jumping into the pros and cons of long-distance online dating it’s worth figuring out just what it is.

In my opinion, driving for more than 2 hours is long-distance. I think of it this way, what distance would make it difficult to get together for an impromptu dinner date?

Although, it’s really a matter of opinion. I guess for some it could be an hour’s drive and for others, it may be 3 hours. Some people may consider getting across town by train, bus, or Lift as long-distance too!

No matter what you think qualifies as long-distance, I’d like to share the pros and cons of long-distance online dating.

CONS:

• When you’re engaging in long-distance online dating, you may not see the person on a regular, weekly basis. This lack of in-person time can make it hard to establish a deep connection with your intended love interest. And for many, to know if chemistry exists there needs to be an in-person physical connection.
• And you could spend all this time staying connected by phone, Facetime, and email, but when you meet…there aren’t any sparks! I’ve seen this happen with a couple of my clients. After building the anticipation up for months, the couple finally meets, and then one or both are no longer interested in continuing the relationship. Such wasted time!
• When tough times occur, your partner has a hard time being there for you in person. What happens when you get a flat tire, or you need to go to the emergency room? Who will be there for you? Also, it can be frustrating for the partner who isn’t able to be there to help you!
• Another difficult thing about long-distance online dating is that you don’t really know what’s going on with someone or if they’re being faithful. You may be obsessing about what they’re doing and who they’re spending their time with. Of course, this can be true if they’re living in the same town too. It just seems harder when you’re living far apart from one another.
• With long-distance dating, it takes more planning and investment of your time, energy, and money to keep the relationship going. Many times, there are costly plane flights and hotel reservations too. Also, there’s planning the time away from work which may eat up your vacation time.

On the other hand, there are some definite positive aspects of long-distance online dating…

PROS:

• You get the opportunity to meet someone wonderful who you’d never have met if you hadn’t been open to dating out of your area.
• When you meet someone via long-distance online dating, you have to spend the time to get to know them via the telephone and video chats. This allows you to build a mental, spiritual, and emotional connection with your partner BEFORE the physical connection. Many couples find this a deeper process for establishing a long-term relationship.
• When dating long-distance, you tend to talk about the tough stuff sooner than later to make sure you’re a match. This is especially true since you don’t want to invest your time, energy, finances, and vacation time to travel if you’re not on the same page and don’t want the same things out of life.
• A couple gets in the groove of talking every day with long-distance online dating. This keeps the communication going. One of my long-distance couples made time every day to get on a Zoom call to connect. And this was a transatlantic relationship during the pandemic! They finally met and it was a match made in heaven!

As you can see there are many benefits and pitfalls with long-distance online dating. Only you can decide if this is for you!

Just know that you have to have stamina and fortitude to do what it takes to make this kind of love connection work.

Although a couple of my client’s relationships ultimately broke up when long-distance dating, I give them credit for giving it a shot. And there have been several clients who have successfully met their life partners through long-distance online dating. What I’ve witnessed is they have a commitment to each other and worked hard to set up the relationship for success.

If you want to explore how to make online dating work better for you and learn how to give yourself the best chance of meeting a lasting life partner, then let’s talk.

My clients meet their ideal life partner, fall in love, and many even get married!

Go to https://motivatedtomarry.com/connect-with-coach-amy/ to find a time for us to connect for a Meet Your Mate Strategy session. I look forward to chatting with you!