We have good intentions. In 2018 we are going to … (fill-in the blank) and … (fill-in the blank) … and the list goes on.  Most of us do not keep our New Year’s resolutions into February, and even fewer get to the next year with our new behaviors as habits. Only 10% of resolutions make it through the end of the year.  This failure confirms, once again, how hard it is to change.

Really? Yes, we are creatures of habit. If we have good habits that is a good thing. If we have bad habits … not so good. I have many of both types. So what is a new insight that might help?  Mark Manson has a book titled, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*CK – A Counter Intuitive Approach to Living a Good Life” that attempts to shock us into a new view of the world. You can add the book to your list, or just take the one key idea and use it for 2018.

The one key goal

Manson argues that we spend so much time giving a F*CK about unimportant things that we do not spend enough time on the important things we should give a F*CK about.  The long list of things we think we should do aren’t that important. The number of “LIKES” on Facebook, or even Facebook itself, is not that important. Doing much of anything to look good to others on Facebook is a false sense of reality.

Focusing on negatives … things we don’t like about our behaviors, is much harder to overcome than moving toward what we really want more of in our life.  How important is it really to lose a few pounds? That exercise program may or may not be really important. Maybe walking more each week is better than a health club membership that you only use in January. My friend dying of cancer does not think work is that important.  He thinks family and friends are very important.

Making a difference with your talents may be of major importance. Building skills in a new area you are passionate about may be an answer to a “calling” you have not listened to in the past. You may want to invest in relationships that are not where you want them to be, and are important. You may need to extract yourself from a toxic relationship.  The choice must be truly YOUR CHOICE. Make sure it is what you really want.

Passion for 2018

What if this year you really looked hard at ONE KEY GOAL that is most important and you are passionate about for 2018? What if you only did that one thing with full commitment. What if you let all those other “nice to haves”, or what other people think are important, stay in the background as not important enough to work on right now.

Look at what you need to do every day (or every hour) to move toward that ONE KEY GOAL. Have clear idea of the consequences (positive and negative) of reaching, or not reaching, your goal.  Build in accountability with yourself (or others if needed) to act every day on the ONE KEY GOAL. Chances are good that leaving the distractions of several New Year’s Resolutions behind will allow you to focus on your most important goal. Be sure it is your goal and not someone else’s goal for you.