In the past month, I’ve attended three funerals. Even though the services were not for immediate family or close friends, they still made me take a moment to appreciate life and realize that the life-is-short adage is real. It was a call to action to check ourselves and choose less attitude and more gratitude.

We were reminded that perhaps we spend too much time griping, groaning, and moaning over things that are minor in the grand scheme of things.

We were inspired by the lessons learned from those who had departed and encouraged to consider the legacy they left — and to think about the legacy we might leave.

• Might there be a way to leave a legacy of positivity rather than negativity?
• Would others sing our praises and pause to ponder our positive impact?
• Will we have left things better than we found them?

Maybe there are some small adjustments we can make to shift toward less attitude and more gratitude. Maybe it starts with the words we choose — words that tilt toward the positive and away from the negative. Consider the following, especially during this season of giving thanks:

Less Attitude:

“I hate that I have to do all the cooking for family this Thanksgiving. Nobody ever helps.”

More Gratitude:

“Although I have to do most of the cooking, I’m grateful to have family to cook for and spend time with during the holiday season. And I will ask for help.”

To gain cooperation during this potentially overwhelming season, try using phrases such as:

• “Would you be willing to…?”
• “Would it be possible to…?”
• “I would appreciate it if…”
• “It would be helpful if you would…”
• “Could you…?”

Less Attitude:

“I’m disappointed that my family lives far away and isn’t able to come for the holidays.”

More Gratitude:

“Although I’m disappointed that my family lives in different places, maybe we can connect virtually and spend time together from afar.”
Or, “Maybe I can have a Friendsgiving celebration with friends locally.”
Or, “Maybe I can use this time alone to reflect, recharge, and regroup from my busy schedule.”

Less Attitude:

“My job is making me work during Thanksgiving weekend because I’m so-called ‘essential personnel.’”

More Gratitude:

“I’m thankful to have a job during these uncertain times and to be considered essential. Although it’s frustrating to have to work the holiday, I’ll find a time to connect with friends and family after the weekend.”

If you’re communicating with friends and family about working the holiday, here are a few phrases that can help keep things positive:

• “Thank you for understanding. We’ll celebrate as soon as I’m off.”
• “Let’s plan a special get-together at a time that works for everyone.”
• “Although I’m working the holiday, I’m grateful we’ll still find a way to connect.”
  .
  The choice is yours. Hopefully, you’ll choose less attitude and more gratitude.

As someone once said:  You can be the person who brightens the room when you enter, or you can be the person who brightens the room when you leave.

And maybe that holds true not just for the room, but also for your life.