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#157 Cold Emails
Denny Hatch -- Direct Mail Expert Denny Hatch -- Direct Mail Expert
For Immediate Release:
Dateline: Philadelphia, PA
Wednesday, May 25, 2022



#157 Blog Post - Wednesday, 25 May 2022

Posted by Denny Hatch


 Why Cold Emails Leave Me Cold:
Two Strangers Spout Gibberish!

Okay. Stopright here. Go back up there and read these two goofy subject lines (a.k.a.headlines) and equally nutty lede paragraphs. 


Myinitial reactions to email #1 from Christine Cunningham:

SubjectLine: “Experiencethe K.I.S.S. of Life…”

Huh?I learned early-on that K.I.S.S. stands for “Keep It Simple, Stupid.”


LedeParagraph: “Iwould love to partner with you…”

Huh?I have never met you. Never heard of you. How dare you presume that I wouldtake you on as a partner? For starters I have a partner: my beloved wife, Peggy;we have been at each other’s side for 52 years and are not interested in anotherpartner.


MyInitial reactions to email #2 from Shachar Lotan:

SubjectLine: “Buildingcurated content web-page…”

Huh?Golly, I have never heard of an un-curated content web page.


LedeParagraph: “Pleasejoin us in welcoming Feedbuild to the world…” 

Huh? We've never met. How dare you presume I would help you welcome Feedbuild to the world when—for starters—I don't have a clue what Feedbuild is.



“Your first10 words are more important than the next ten thousand.”

  —Elmer “Sizzle” Wheeler


These are thetwo most bizarre approaches to a stranger by Cunningham and Lotan I have everseen in 60 years of marketing. No introduction. No foreplay. No promise ofbenefits. No chemistry. No winning of trust or likeability. Just demands for a decision and immediate change in my behavior.


Put anotherway, these subject lines and lede paragraphs are the equivalent of walking intoa lively party and saying to the first millennial you run into, "Let's ----!"


Afterdeciding to critique these two unsolicited emails, it made sense to Google thetwo perpetrators to see what they say about themselves. Here are the links.


AboutChristine Cunningham.



AboutSachar Lotan



To savetime, here’s a précis:

These pages are all about themselves—ChristineCunningham and Sachar Lotan mightily blowing their own horns. Their education, theircareers, their titles, their jobs, their achievements.


“The prospect doesn’t give a damn aboutyou, your product or your company. All that matters is, ‘What’s in it for me?’ ”—Bob Hacker


“Always listen to W-I-I FM.” —OldMarketing Adage.


Consider last week's blog post thatfeatured Ed McLean’s 17-year Grand Control mailing for Newsweek. In the 847words in his three-page letter, “you” and “your” appeared 52 times.


Takeawaysto Consider

• When contacting a prospect or customerwith a sales pitch, consider using the 13 most powerful words in the EnglishLanguage:

You – Save– Money – Easy - Guarantee – Health – Free

Results –New – Love – Discovery – Safety – Proven


• Always remember the seven key copy drivers—theemotional hot buttons that cause people to act.

Fear –Greed – Guilt – Anger – Exclusivity – Salvation – Flattery


“If your copy isn’t positively dripping with one ormore of these, tear it up and start over.”

—Bob Hacker




Word Count: 500


Word Count: 2223 



The Most Fun You Can Have
In the English Language
At age 15, Denny Hatch—as a lowly apprentice—wrote his first news release for a Connecticut summer theater. To his astonishment it ran verbatim in The Middletown Press.He was instantly hooked on writing. After a two-year stint in the U.S. Army (1958-60), Denny had nine jobs in his first 12 years in business. He was fired from five of them and went on to save two businesses and start three others. One of his businesses—WHO’S MAILING WHAT! newsletterand archive service founded in 1984—revolutionized the science of how to measure the success of competitors’ direct mail. In the past 55 yearshe has been a book club director, magazine publisher, advertising copywriter/designer, editor, journalist and marketing consultant. He is the author of four published novels and seven books on business and marketing.



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