Practice Mindful Kindness

There are two components of mindful kindness:

1.  Consideration and action regarding the social conditions, practices, and policies that prevent employees from finding the good in human nature.

2.  Random acts of kindness conducted in mindful ways that are sensitive, inclusive, and equitable.

Both of these components focus on treating everyone with mutual care and respect:

·    Practice honesty with consideration. Brutal feedback is not kind. Be clear, direct, and compassionate.

·    Show you care with unconditional acceptance. While you might not like or accept certain behavior, separate the action from the person.

·    Step through fear to do what is right, right now. Be courageous, and practice justice and compassion for all.

·    Welcome others into your circle. Extend kindness to everyone; grow your circle of friends.

Even the smallest acts of mindful kindness can go a long way, especially under the microscopic gaze of others. While the biochemical boost is powerful, research has found it only lasts three to four minutes. That's why it's so important to make kindness an ongoing daily practice.

Expanding Kindness to Community

A new analysis of studies reveals that witnessing goodness inspires us to be kind. When we see or hear about people acting kindly or helpful, we are inspired to do the same. Even the smallest gesture can have a meaningful ripple and go a long way.

In Working Knowledge, published by Harvard Business School, researcher, professor, and author Boris Groysberg and journalist Susan Seligson identified seven simple phrases we can use to communicate kindness.

Words of Kindness to Use Everyday

1.  "I hear you."

2.  "Are you okay?"

3.  "What can we/I do to help?"

4.  "How are you managing these days?"

5.  "I'm here for you."

6.  "I know you're doing the best you can."

7.  "Thank you."

Incorporating these phrases into our daily conversations expand kind communities. They help to satisfy our need for love and belonging, and create unity.

Daily Kindness Practices

Kindness in community sustains our capacity to thrive. When given freely, it moves beyond our immediate circle (family, co-workers, organization) to our greater community, through:

1.  Service: reach out to those around you. This time of year, generosity and giving are top of mind. Consider ways you can extend kindness beyond the holiday season to make it a daily practice.

2.  Responsibility: take positive action wherever you are. Don't give in to hopelessness, cynicism, or blame shifting. Even the smallest deed can have a positive impact.

3.  Integrity: do the right thing. Acknowledge the hurdles, and work to overcome them.

4.  Tolerance: Honor the strength in diversity. Point out the goodness and kindness in your community.

Tara Cousineau, PhD, author of The Kindness Cure (New Harbinger Publications, 2018), writes that "how we learn from our past and envision our future depend on how we choose to live in the present moment."

When kindness is our north star, compassion, generosity, and forgiveness become natural, and spread exponentially.

Dr. Maynard Brusman

Consulting Psychologist & EQ Executive Coach and Mindful Leadership Consultant

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