by Frame of MindOctober 18, 2018

Do you believe that it takes two to tango? Do both people need to put in the work? President and Founder of Frame of Mind Coaching™, Kim Ades, shares her unique perspective.

“When one person changes their steps, the entire dance changes.” -Kim Ades

You’ve likely heard the expression, “it takes two to tango.” It means that in order for a relationship to run smoothly, in order to work well with someone or in order to overcome a conflict with someone, both parties need to put in the same amount of effort. It’s not enough for one person to do all the work.

Or so you may think.

Watch as Kim Ades, President and Founder of Frame of Mind Coaching™, shares her unique spin on this old adage that many people live by.

Transcription:

Kim Ades: Many people believe that it takes two to tango.

At Frame of Mind Coaching™, we believe that it doesn’t necessarily require two to tango.

If one person changes the steps in the dance, the dance changes.

So what does that mean?

When in a conflict with someone, many people think it requires both individuals to compromise.

That it requires both individuals to agree to change.

We suggest that if you change, the other person will either follow you or they will say, “I don’t like this dance” and they’ll leave.

Either way, you are dancing the dance that you want to be dancing.

It does not take two to tango.

It only requires one person.

When one person changes their steps, the entire dance changes.

Prior to coaching, many of our clients wonder, “Won’t my partner, my colleagues, my friends and my family need to be coached too in order for my coaching to be successful?” Our response to them is this…

When you begin to change through coaching – when you become more optimistic, more engaged, more confident, more decisive and more content – others will either come along for the ride or they will drop off the map. Those who are aligned with the new you will stay by your side, and those who have been holding you back will finally let you go.