by Frame of MindNovember 30, 2017

Name: Lynn Mesterhazy

Job: Homemaker, Former Teacher

Coaching: 1-on-1 Coaching
 
 
 
How did you find out about Frame of Mind Coaching?
I heard Kim Ades speak on a dating podcast for women over 40. She talked about how our thinking creates the meaning we give our experiences and those meanings dictate how we feel about the events. At the time, I was feeling stuck and in lots of emotional pain. I wondered if examining my thinking could help me feel better and grow. So I reached out to FOM Coaching.

What were you struggling with before coaching?
I was recently divorced and feeling pretty bad about how my decision affected my children. I believed that the divorce meant that I was a bad mother, that I had let my children down, that they were doomed to struggle and that others must be thinking that I was selfish and bad at relationships.

How did FOM Coaching impact that?
Coaching helped me see that the pain I was experiencing was because of the story I was telling myself about the divorce, not the divorce itself. One day, my coach asked me, “Who told you that you weren’t a good mother because you got divorced?” In that moment, I got it. I had invented this story, given it a ton of weight and made myself feel guilty.

This realization was so freeing and powerful. It totally changed my outlook on my future and my children’s future. It allowed me to focus on what my ex-husband and I could do to support them.

I can see the effects that coaching had in every aspect of my life. Now, when I feel badly about something, I ask myself, “What do I believe about this situation?” I know now that my feelings are a direct result of the way I’m interpreting my experiences. Learning this has helped me stay focused on what I want to accomplish, what kind of relationships I want and what I want from life.

How has FOM Coaching impacted your relationships?
Coaching has impacted every relationship in my life. I’m a better friend and a better partner. I used to feel unsure in my choices and like I had to put on a tough exterior to protect myself from the opinions of others.

Since coaching, I don’t take things as personally. I’m firm on the inside and I know what I want. Before, if someone was trying to push me away from my values, I would be argumentative. Now, I stay firm in my beliefs without reacting. I also used to be afraid of conflict. I understand how to express myself and know that I will be okay no matter what happens in my life. There will be some painful things, but I will be okay.

Most importantly, I’m a better mother. My new frame of mind allows me to be the best mom to my children because I am able to get to the cause of what’s bothering them. I now feel fully confident in my ability to handle any situation or problem that may arise.

What was it like journaling every day?
It made the relationship with my coach grow stronger. It helped us solidify a relationship that would have taken a lot longer to form had I not been journaling. Journaling moves you forward so much quicker and it builds the trust and the intimacy between the coach and the client.

What was your relationship with your coach like?
I knew that she held me in the best possible light; that no matter what I told her or how I felt about something, she wasn’t judging me and would help me work through it. I felt like she genuinely cared about my well-being and what I was trying to accomplish in my life. She listened to me and was very present.

Would you recommend FOM Coaching to others?
Absolutely. I have recommended it to many people. Those who ended up doing it were definitely experiencing pain and were able to move past that pain, like I did, as a result of coaching. You don’t have to stay stuck in a painful place. Talk to one of the Frame of Mind Coaches - even one conversation can make a huge difference.

What events from your past are keeping you stuck? What would it be like if you could remove that negativity from your life?

Take the FOM Coaching Assessmentand schedule a call with us to discover how we can help you move from where you are now to where you want to be.