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Beware if You Think like Cinderella or Belle
Susan Allan -- The Marriage Forum Susan Allan -- The Marriage Forum
For Immediate Release:
Dateline: Santa Barbara, CA
Saturday, January 27, 2024


2 Romantic Delusions that Keep Women Miserable

Some fairytales are so deeply ingrained in our culture that we may not realize that we have been programmed to think and behave just like the heroine in the story. While Fairy tales like “Cinderella” and “Beauty and the Beast”, seem romantic they can keep women from living powerful, successful lives by suggesting that giving up their freedom can work.    

Every time that a bride picks a Cinderella theme, isn’t she heading for disappointment? Each time a groom sees his bride arrive in a pumpkin coach for their Disney resort wedding, will he be able to live up to his princely image?

Both fairytales have affected millions of girls and women, and only at the final curtain can you see the outcome for yourself so avoid being swept away by fairytales to create your most successful life and learn to be romantic and realistic.

Key Thinking- Know that YOU Have Power- Focus on building your own Fabulous Life more than joining yourself to a Prince or an Enchanted Prince for reflected power.   


Myth #1- Cinderella’s Story- He’s a Prince who rescues YOU.

A.    WHO YOU SEEK: If you are seeking a handsome alpha “Prince”

B.    WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE: If you find your life dissatisfying or even miserable.

C.    LIFE STRATEGY: If you feel like a victim needing to be rescued first by a “Fairy Godmother” and then by a “Prince”.  

D.    HOW TO SOLVE/EVOLVE THIS”: Change your thought pattern; take back your power and find people to help you who won’t take over your life. Think of a Fairy Godmother as a mentor or advisor.

Key Thinking – Women no longer need to depend on a man to save them or empower them; that was the old way of thinking.  Find powerful people who want to help without a huge cost to you.

Key Thinking- You’ve heard of “grooming” and “trafficking”; there was a lot of that in the eras of fairytales so beware of giving away your autonomy and be particularly wary of who you accept as a lover!

 Most women have been with at least one man who seemed prince-like until he didn’t. Whether you’ve dated millionaires or ambitious men you will have seen that “after the ball” every Cinderella needs to cater to The Prince; it’s a pivot from one messy job to another. A princess may direct the cook and servants instead of scrubbing the floors herself but is that how you want to spend your life?

We can look at Princess Catherine, Prince Williams’s wife, and see the unbelievable energy and effort that she expends to keep all the plates spinning in her seemingly magical life. We can observe what she has given up so please ask yourself if the lure of your prince’s version of The Crown Jewels is enough. Please remember that the jewels may be magnificent, but if independence is important to you, in how you live and dress; where you vacation and who you have as friends; and even how many children you have, etc. consider your choice very carefully.

Unless Cinderella’s prince or your prince is one in a million, it’s a hard life and in various countries, even today, the power of life or death over a princess remains.  Have you thought about The Red Queen in “Alice in Wonderland”, another great fairytale, when she screamed, “Off with her head!”? If you think as romantically as a Cinderella, would you recognize the potential danger of that mother-in-law, who is enormously wealthy and powerful? But the ultimate programming of the Cinderella myth was in India where widows who were queens and princesses themselves were obliged to engage in the practice of Sati, the ritual immolation of the widows of princes and high-born gentlemen that was only made illegal and a crime in 1987!  Yes, the Cinderella myth of “Happily Ever After” can be lethal.

Myth #2 Beauty and the Beast – He’s an enchanted Prince and YOUR LOVE rescues him.  

Beauty and the Beast

A.    WHO YOU SEEK: It’s time to let go of the attraction of tormented men and other fixer-upper people.  

B.    WHO YOU THINK YOU ARE: You don’t need to save other people to have self-respect and a life purpose.  

C.    LIFE STRATEGY: First Belle saves the Beast and then she leaves to save her father, rushing from one person’s disaster to the next, living on an exhausting hamster wheel.   

D.    HOW TO SOLVE/EVOLVE In a stable happy relationship, 2 partners have skills and can co-create a wonderful long-term relationship, helping one another. When you “teach someone to fish” you are supporting their independence and your peace. 

Please click to read the rest of the article on yourtango.com

The next man you meet who may seem like a Handsome Prince or an Enchanted Prince is a Call to Action for you; look and listen until you are sure who he is and what he is offering you.   

Susan Allan’s Heartspace® The Marriage Forum Inc. 805-695-8405   818-314-1200

Introduction to Susan Allan and Life Mastery Training  LearnDesk


Nonviolent Communication® expert           Certified Mediator The Divorce Forum®  

Dating, Marriage, Reconciliation, Peaceful no-court Divorce, Avoiding Domestic Violence


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Name: Susan Allan
Group: The Marriage Forum Inc.
Dateline: Santa Barbara, CA United States
Direct Phone: 805-695-8405
Main Phone: 805-695-8405
Cell Phone: 818-314-1200
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