Monday, June 15, 2026
By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC
It’s no secret that one of the biggest challenges divorced parents face is staying in good communication with your children. Obviously, all parents struggle with communication issues as their children grow. But children whose lives are dramatically altered by separation or divorce need even more attention. And diligent observation by their parents.
Here are some tips that most professionals agree on to encourage positive and productive communication between you and your children. Many of these are obvious or innate behaviors. Some, however, can easily be forgotten amid the challenges you are juggling daily in your own life.
Be Attentive, Understanding and Empathic
Take time to see the world through your children’s eyes. As a result, you will be better able to meet their needs and understand their confusion or aggression. You’ll likely also find appropriate ways to dissolve tension through your conversation and caring behaviors.
· Be available and attentive when your child comes to you to talk or ask questions. That means turning off the TV, closing devises, not answering the phone and giving them eye-contact and a welcoming smile. Sometimes attempting to talk to you is the result of considerable thought and risk on their part. Encourage these conversations when they happen.
· It is helpful to sit, kneel or in other ways get down closer to your child’s level when you talk. Towering over them is a form of intimidation that does not translate into safety or trust.
· Keep your conversations private unless they want to include others. Let them know they are safe in confiding to you and that you are interested and care about matters that concern them.
· Don’t dismiss a subject lightly if it is one bothering your child. Laughing, joking or teasing will create alienation that may ultimately discourage your child from sharing what is bothering them. This is a dangerous road to travel, especially as your children develop into their teen years.
· Equally important is to never embarrass your children or put them on the spot in front of others. This will immediately close the door to honest, trustworthy communication.
· Avoid talking to your child when you are angry or upset with them or others. Promise to talk at another time and at a specific place after you’ve had a chance to settle down and regain your objectivity.
· Be an active listener. Don’t interrupt while your child is talking. Listen carefully and then paraphrase back what you heard them say. Ask if your interpretation is correct. They’ll tell you. This give and take will help you more precisely understand what is really at issue.
Maintain a Strong Connection
Taking the time to communicate in a non-judgmental and trustworthy manner with your children will pay off in maintaining a strong connection with them over the years and decades ahead.
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Rosalind Sedacca, CDC is recognized as The Voice of Child-Centered Divorce. She is a Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach and founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network which provides advice, programs, coaching and other valuable resources for parents who are facing, moving through or transitioning after a divorce. She is the author of several books, ebooks and e-courses on co-parenting success strategies including an 8-hr Anger Management For Co-Parents Course. Learn more about Rosalind’s services at https://www.childcentereddivorce.com
About the Child-Centered Divorce Network
A support network for parents, Child-Centered Divorce provides articles, advice, a weekly newsletter, books, coaching services, a free ebook on Post-Divorce Parenting: Success Strategies for Getting It Right and other valuable resources on divorce and parenting issues. Learn more at www.childcentereddivorce.com.