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Meeting Findings on Funerals, Grief and End-of-Life Planning
From:
Gail Rubin, The Doyenne of Death, Funeral Expert Gail Rubin, The Doyenne of Death, Funeral Expert
Albuquerque, NM
Thursday, August 20, 2026


Participants at London Death Discussion Meeting
 

International group calls for better conversations, meaningful funeral rituals and new approaches to engaging the public with mortality

LONDON, England -- A group of leading death educators, academics, funeral professionals and end-of-life advocates gathered in London to explore how society can become more comfortable talking about death. They also discussed how funerals, cremation, education and technology may evolve as attitudes toward mortality change.

The Gathering of Death Literacy and End-of-Life Conversation Pioneers, held at Exit Here funeral directors in Chelsea, brought together innovators from the United Kingdom and United States who have spent years finding creative ways to encourage people to discuss, plan for and engage with death.

A central conclusion emerged from the day-long discussion: while people consistently respond positively to death education and end-of-life planning initiatives, turning that interest into action remains a major challenge.

"It was wonderful to spend a day with people who are making such a difference in getting people to talk about death rather than avoiding it," said Gail Rubin, Certified Thanatologist and The Doyenne of Death®, who helped organize the gathering with Plenna founder David Sunderland.

"We're also seeing exciting changes in the way people think about funerals and cremation," Rubin observed. "A funeral doesn't have to follow a prescribed formula, and cremation doesn't have to mean skipping ceremony altogether. Ritual, gathering and remembrance still matter. The challenge is helping people understand the choices they have and encouraging them to talk about those choices before a death occurs."

Participants included David Sunderland, founder of Plenna; Oliver Peyton, OBE, founder of Exit Here; Professor Jenny Kitzinger, creator of the Before I Die Festival; Professor Tom Shakespeare, social scientist, bioethicist and author; Isabel Russo, Executive Director of The Good Funeral Guide; Laura Barnett, General Manager of Passages International UK; and Rubin.

Communication—not another product—is the key

Participants agreed that improving "death literacy"—people's knowledge and confidence in discussing death, dying and end-of-life decisions—depends primarily on better human communication.

While online resources, artificial intelligence and digital planning tools can help people prepare, the group noted that conversations about death often reach a point where people want to speak with another human being rather than simply browse information or interact with technology.

The participants also discussed the need to connect existing organizations and initiatives rather than continually creating new ones. One phrase that captured the discussion was: "Don't reinvent the wheel—connect the cogs."

Death-related services and organizations are well developed, participants observed, but often operate in separate professional and community silos.

Rethinking funerals and direct cremation

The future of funerals emerged as another major theme.

Participants discussed concern that the rapid growth of direct cremation—cremation without a traditional funeral service beforehand—can sometimes result in families bypassing meaningful opportunities for ritual, gathering and remembrance.

Exit Here presented an alternative approach: families can choose cremation while still incorporating celebrations, receptions, hospitality and ceremonies in distinctive settings. The company is finding great success with this hospitality-minded approach.

The group also discussed the continuing human need for ritual after a death.

Society may benefit, participants suggested, from rediscovering rituals that help families and communities acknowledge loss rather than treating the disposition of a body as the entire funeral experience.

Natural burial was identified as another area with significant potential for growth in the United Kingdom. However, access to sites near urban areas and people's desire for permanent grave markers remain obstacles for choosing natural burial.

Sometimes the best way to talk about death is not to start with death

Participants shared examples of programs that successfully engage people by approaching mortality indirectly.

Humor, movies, science discussions, popular culture and even vampire and zombie themes can make conversations about death less intimidating and draw audiences who might never attend an event explicitly advertised as an end-of-life discussion.

Rubin described her Mortality Movies programs, which use films to start conversations about death, grief and advance planning. At one funeral home, a regular attendee ultimately made his cremation arrangements with the firm as a direct result of attending the screenings in their chapel.

Oliver Peyton with Exit Here described their monthly bereavement cafés which are open to the community. They also hold unconventional activities including karaoke and Easter egg hunts designed to make a funeral home a more familiar and approachable community space.

Professor Jenny Kitzinger's Before I Die Festival has similarly used arts, education and public events to encourage people to engage openly with mortality.

Death education reaches the classroom

Participants also welcomed the introduction of grief, bereavement and death education into England's Relationships, Sex and Health Education (RSHE) curriculum beginning in September 2026. They called it an important step toward making conversations about mortality a normal part of life for young people. They noted that England, Scotland, Wales and Northern Ireland each have their own education systems, and the new requirement applies only in England.

They cautioned, however, that implementation is likely to be gradual and that differences among jurisdictions within the United Kingdom may create varying approaches.

Connecting generations was another priority. Older adults are often more motivated to plan for death and later life, while younger people may have greater skills in digital communication and social media. Participants discussed ways those strengths could complement one another.

Technology brings both opportunities and challenges

Artificial intelligence was viewed as both an opportunity and a disruptive force for end-of-life planning.

Static websites offering checklists and information may increasingly be replaced by interactive tools capable of guiding individuals through personalized planning conversations. At the same time, participants stressed that technology should complement, not replace, the human conversations people seek when confronting mortality.

Digital legacy was also discussed as a growing concern, with families experiencing difficulty accessing the social media accounts and digital assets of someone who has died. Social media reminders from a deceased person's account can be distressing to loved ones.

Grief may provide a broader doorway

The gathering also explored ways to broaden conversations beyond death itself.

Participants noted that grief arises from many kinds of loss, including divorce, job loss, illness and major social or environmental change. "Loss cafés" and similar gatherings may therefore provide an accessible way to introduce conversations about grief and mortality to a wider audience.

The group identified additional issues requiring attention. These include the low use of legally binding advance decisions to refuse medical treatment, the continuing gender gap in attendance at Death Cafes and other end-of-life programs, funeral industry regulation, and ways to reach younger audiences.

Despite the diversity of their work, participants returned repeatedly to one fundamental principle: societies are better prepared for death when people have opportunities to talk about it.

"Death touches every family, yet we still treat talking about it as unusual," Rubin said. "Every conversation helps make the next one easier. And when people talk ahead of time, they are much better positioned to make thoughtful choices about medical care, funerals, cremation and how they want to be remembered."

Participants

Gail Rubin, CT — Certified Thanatologist, educator, author, speaker and television host; The Doyenne of Death®; AGoodGoodbye.com

David Sunderland — Founder of Plenna and author of The Punctuation of Loss; Plenna.org

Professor Jenny Kitzinger — Cardiff University professor emerita and creator of the Before I Die Festival

Oliver Peyton, OBE — Entrepreneur and founder of Exit Here independent funeral directors

Isabel Russo — Executive Director of The Good Funeral Guide CIC

Professor Tom Shakespeare — Social scientist, bioethicist and author

Laura Barnett — General Manager, Passages International UK

A playlist of each participant discussing their involvement in the field is available on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZBkNc_GYu6U

About the Gathering

The Gathering of Death Literacy and End-of-Life Conversation Pioneers was convened by Gail Rubin and David Sunderland on July 24, 2026, at Exit Here, 391 King's Road, Chelsea, London. The gathering brought together practitioners and thought leaders in death education, funeral service, bereavement, ethics, end-of-life planning and public engagement to share successful practices and identify opportunities for future collaboration.

Media Contacts

Gail Rubin

The Doyenne of Death®

gail@agoodgoodbye.com

AGoodGoodbye.com

David Sunderland

Plenna

contact@plenna.org

Plenna.org

PHOTO CAPTION

Death literacy and end-of-life pioneers gathered at Exit Here in Chelsea, London, on July 24, 2026, to discuss new approaches to public conversations about death, funerals, cremation, grief and end-of-life planning. Pictured from left: David Sunderland, founder of Plenna; Oliver Peyton OBE, founder of Exit Here; Gail Rubin, Certified Thanatologist and The Doyenne of Death®; Laura Barnett, General Manager of Passages International UK; Tom Shakespeare, social scientist and author; Jenny Kitzinger, creator of the Before I Die Festival; and Isabel Russo, Executive Director of The Good Funeral Guide.

 

Gail Rubin, CT, is author and host of the award-winning book and television series, A Good Goodbye: Funeral Planning for Those Who Don’t Plan to Die, Hail and Farewell: Cremation Ceremonies, Templates and TipsKICKING THE BUCKET LIST: 100 Downsizing and Organizing Things to Do Before You Die and The Before I Die Festival in a Box™.

Rubin is a Certified Thanatologist (that's a death educator) and a popular speaker who uses humor and films to get the end-of-life and funeral planning conversation started. She "knocked 'em dead" with her TEDx talk, A Good Goodbye. She provides continuing education credit classes for attorneys, doctors, nurses, social workers, hospice workers, financial planners, funeral directors and other professionals. She's a Certified Funeral Celebrant and funeral planning consultant who has been interviewed in national and local print, broadcast and online media.

Known as The Doyenne of Death®, she is the event coordinator of the Before I Die New Mexico Festival and author of a guide to holding such festivals. Her podcast is also called The Doyenne of Death®. She produces videos about the funeral business and related topics. Her YouTube Channel features hundreds of videos!

Rubin is a member of the Association for Death Education and Counseling, the International Cemetery, Cremation and Funeral Association, Toastmasters International and the National Speakers Association. Her speaking profile is available at eSpeakers.com.

Gail Rubin has been interviewed about funeral planning issues in national and local broadcast, print and online media. Outlets include The Huffington Post, Money Magazine, Kiplinger, CBS Radio News, WGN-TV,  and local affiliates for NPR, PBS, FOX, ABC-TV, CBS-TV and NBC-TV. Albuquerque Business First named her as one of their 2019 Women of Influence.

Sign up for a free planning form and occasional informative newsletter at her website, AGoodGoodbye.com.

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