Tuesday, March 3, 2020
People who are truly happy in life are those who exhibit signs that: (1) They have come to understand that only they are responsible for their own lives and happiness rather than outside influences or others' actions. (2) They have an overriding purpose in life. (3) They have a significant relationship with a partner in life. (4) They have freedom relative to managing their own time—yes that includes enough money to buy some security.
People who often think or perceive that they are happy, but are likely not, tend to practice what I call the "happy substitutes" of life. Drinking, pot smoking or other drugs, pornography, "getting away" to crystal clear waters at Sandals resort, or the biggest of all—saving someone else they perceive as unhappy (or the world) by forcing on others what they think will make others happy. Short term happiness through substitutes or forcing "happy things" on others while neglecting oneself leads people down the completely wrong path. Things, vacation escapes and momentary highs are not happiness but symptoms of unhappiness.
Best practices for happiness. Come to terms that you are responsible for own happiness. DON'T CARE WHAT OTHERS THINK. Start thinking each morning of 2-3 small things you can do today to bring a bit of happiness. Interact with happy thoughts to those close to you every day first, and make every interaction with others happy as well. Finally, lamenting the past is worthless because it's gone. Dreaming of the future is not a solution because we can't predict it. We can only act NOW. Small steps end up big ones.