Writing a blog causes me to be very aware of articles and ideas that might be a good blog topic.  I want to be sure I have good sources so I won’t be wrong.  Is my blog going to be good enough to justify peoples’ time? I would hate to miss out on a really good topic opportunity. What if I become a victim of someone stealing my idea?

The Harvard Business Review article “Don’t Let Your Inner Fears Limit Your Career” …

… lists those four fears (bold in the above paragraph) as normal and common.   The article is written by Matt Brubaker and Foster Mobley.

We have a phrase at Change Masters, “If you scratch crazy behavior, there is always fear behind it.”

The truth is that fear is normal. How you deal with your fear makes the key difference.  Fear of being wrong can  push you to check your facts as a healthy response, or display analysis paralysis as the downside.  I recall when I had the fear of not being good enough, which was really about not feeling lovable (yes, check my childhood.)  This fear makes it harder to be authentic. Fear of missing out can attract you to too many meetings. The fear of being victimized breaks down trust.

The HBR article suggests getting help from a friend, counselor or coach. My personal choice, when I was in my 40’s, was to do several years of “whitewater counseling” to learn how to name my emotions, understand them, and manage my response behaviors.  I was confident of my ability to accomplish objectives. I was not confident that I was lovable if I did not amaze people with my accomplishments.  My fears limited me. If you are ever in doubt, I would recommend getting help; and  give it at least six sessions. After four sessions, I was ready to quit. The fifth session was the breakthrough for me. It was time very well spent.

Courage is not letting fear stop you from your higher goal.

Brubaker and Mobley recommend owning your fear rather than suppressing it. Their three recommended steps are:

1. Acknowledge the fear. Be willing to look at what is real and what is from ones past or unrealistic.
2. Interrogate the fear to better understand the source. Often the fear is based on historical experiences that may or may not apply today. Journaling works well for me and many others.
3. Choose a different course of action, and take action.  Find a better direction and move toward it.

Many people to not realize that fear is warping what they do and say. Being aware is the first step. Understand the fear and the impact. Decide what you want to do about it.