Ashland, OR

Thursday, February 03, 2011

Video Clip: Click to Watch

According to Dr. Rick Kirschner, motivational speaker, coach, educator and bestselling coauthor of the newly released audiobook from Macmillan, 'Dealing With People You Can't Stand,' the key to bringing out the best in people is to let them know that you recognize and appreciate them, even when their actions seem to indicate that they don't appreciate themselves.  In fact, you can project a positive value on someone behaving badly, and if they prefer your projection, they may very well claim it instead.

He calls this power of positive projection 'pygmalion power'   "It's based on the idea that most people you deal with will rise or fall to the level of your expectations and projections," says Kirschner. "This power has been used by exceptional teachers to turn average students into exceptional ones, by loving wives to turn angry husbands into loving ones, and by managers to turn poorly performing employees into stellar ones."

"When you talk to someone like they are not just capable of doing better but that they actually are better than how they're behaving, very few people will argue with you. More likely, they'll make an immediate effort to behave in a way that makes your projection true," says Kirschner, known as 'Dr. K' to his speaking and coaching clients.

Dr. Kirschner says that when people get their buttons pushed by others, it's tempting to think or say something that reinforces the worst of it, like 'That's the problem with you. You always ,' or 'You never.' But a more skill response is to break the connection in the mind of your problem person, by saying 'That's not like you!' and then describe how you want them to be as if they truly are capable of living up to your description."

More information on bringing out the best in people at their worst can be found in Dr. Kirschner's newly released Macmillan Audiobook based on the international bestselling book by the same title, 'Dealing With People You Can't Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst'(Kirschner & Brinkman, McGraw-Hill)

"We're very excited about this release from Macmillan Audio.  People have been asking for a spoken word version of our bestselling book for years, and this is it.   We hear from numerous people every year about how this material has helped them to reduce conflict and increase cooperation in their lives.  Making it available as a set of CDs or a digital download means more people can avail themselves of these tried and true patterns for effective communication under difficult conditions."  

Dr. Rick Kirschner presents entertaining, engaging and powerful keynote speeches, training programs, group and individual coaching sessions through his company, The Art of Change LLC. The Art of Change Skills for Life™ empower people to deal successfully with professional and personal challenges and bring about positive change.  Dr. K has worked with such client organizations as NASA, Heineken, Progressive Insurance, Providence Healthcare, Starbucks,Texas Instruments and YPO.  

Dr. Kirschner is the author or coauthor of 7 books, including the international bestseller 'Dealing With People You Can't Stand,' 'Life By Design,'  'Love Thy Customer,'  and his comprehensive communication program, 'Insider's Guide To The Art of Persuasion,'  available at http://TheArtofChange.com'   Dr. Kirschner's next book, 'How To Click With People,' is due this summer from Hyperion Books.   Learn more at  http://theartofchange.com  Visit http://www.learntopersuade.com for free resources available from Dr. Kirschner.

Dr. Rick Kirschner

Motivational Speaker, Educator, Bestselling Author

The Art of Change LLC

Ashland, OR

541-488-2992